UNCONDITIONAL vrs CONDITIONAL
Last week we
looked at the kind of love that is dependent on certain traits we see in a
person, which I call superficial love. And this week we are gonna try to
explore the other side of the coin; unconditional love.
So as the name
suggests this kind of love is independent of anything. It never dies or fades
away or diminishes. It is love without any constraints or limits. Have you ever
felt anything like this or close to this before? Where you would do anything
for the other person and nothing they do can change the way you feel. You may
get hurt and disappointed, sure. The way
you feel still doesn’t change even though you may want it to.
You see, this
kind of love is not by choice; it just happens. You don’t choose who to love or
there are some people that would never experience the beauty of love. That’s
why it’s difficult to accept certain couples and their union because maybe one
isn’t physically becoming or has a terrible personality. And because you don’t
choose who to love, you cannot tune the feeling off. You can’t stop loving them
when you want to.
You are
supposed to be happy and selfless, always thinking of the other party and not
yourself. And you are supposed to know when what you feel for someone (besides
your blood) is love. Actually, unconditional love happens in fairy tales too.
That is how come they have happy endings.
You may not
understand them then but in that state such trivial things like physical beauty
do not matter to them. Until you find
yourself in the same shoes. We could put parental love in this category because
they are supposed to love us despite anything we might do because they gave
birth to us. Perfect friendships should fall here too. Ideally, friendship
should stand the test of time and all of that…
And the
ultimate example of unconditional love is what God has for man. He takes care
of us and gives us life despite our ungratefulness. And it is because of this
same ungratefulness that we can look up and ask for more and cry when something
small happens to us because we cannot imagine a situation worse than ours. I
don’t know if what man feels towards God can be termed unconditional. If the
affection I have for my parents is any indication and seeing God as a parent,
some of us love with strings attached.
Well, I got
another question. Does unconditional love really exist? Because it may just be
an idealistic idea of what we would like love to be and not what love really
is. Take parental love for instance. Unconditional love is supposed to be
unending and not capable of reducing, right? But let’s just cast our minds back
a bit. Has there ever been an instance where the affection you felt towards
someone faded away? I’ll bet initially you thought the way you were feeling was
never gonna change or end. But it did. And are you able to tell when you love
someone and when you are not? I know I never can so if you can, you can show me
how. Just please don’t tell me I’ll just know.
So what
happened? What caused the change? I’ll say it was partly you, partly them and
partly fate. Sometimes you can tell right away that it is something you did, or
something they did. Other times you can’t tell outright but then you are sure
it wasn’t you. No matter how much you may think you had nothing to do with the
change in your partner’s affection for you, I’d say you did. Either directly or
otherwise and whether they admit it or not.
The other side
is responsible for not seeing the good in you and appreciating it or for being
too choosy. For letting trivial stuff bother them. But the thing is
trivialities are not the same with everyone. You know, like how one man’s meat
is another man’s poison and all…
And maybe it
just was not meant to be. So somewhere along the line you have to let go so the
real ones can come along.
Comments
Post a Comment