Choosing Happiness

So we're back here again, at the beginning of a new year. 2016 is here. We’ve said our Hello's and Hi’s and we’re getting to know each other with each day that passes. She’s an acquaintance. We can never say for sure that we know her until her last passing day. And even then it becomes “I knew her. She was good to me” or “I wish I could erase her from my mind”, like a bad memory. But until then we’re still learning. We don’t know what she has for us, but we have plans and hopes. Some of us wrote down our promises to her and we’ve already broken some, no judging. Some of us choose to live by the day, cool. Whatever your plan is, I hope at least that you did an evaluation and assessment of yourself from last year. Like the targets you missed, friends you lost and made, things you’re proud of yourself for and stuff like that. I want to believe that whatever we do this year is based on things we did last year that either worked or didn’t work. Which only shows that we are really learning, from both our past mistakes and those of others.

About forgiveness; forgive others, but forgive yourself first. You know how stuff happen, some we can’t control and some we let happen and then we can’t get over them and we blame ourselves? First of all, no matter what it is, remember that God loves you. If he hasn't cast you out, why do that to yourself? Plus he forgives. No matter what it is, he forgives and you only need to ask. It is quite hard to accept when memories keep rushing back but push. Accept that it has happened and nothing is gonna change that. Admit that it was wrong that isn’t you and you are not going back to it. Seriously, if you don’t forgive yourself how do go on and forgive others? But you’ll find that you are a much happier person when you hold nothing against anyone. You see, I've realised that in holding on, you only stop yourself from growing. And how can you be human and not grow? That’s the essence of living; to grow. And what's worse? Half the people you hold grudges against don't even know about them. They don't feel what you feel. It's mainly you. You who wallows in self-pity and regrets and failures you pin on someone else. Forgive, but not without learning something new.About apologizing; learn to say sorry, if you don’t already know how. Don’t let your ego take away your opportunities and destroy your relationships because saying sorry isn’t always about being wrong. It’s also about wanting to ‘be at peace with all around you’, like the good book says. And while you are at it, be appreciative of the people around you who have you in mind and heart and all they do cos really a life without anyone holding you down is a miserable one.

And love. If there’s anything you ever give out freely, let it be love. But please oh, love with wisdom and don’t end up making yourself and others around you miserable. That’s all I’ll say about it.

Really, unhappiness is a choice available to all of us. You choose to either be happy or unhappy. Just like you choose to either dance to the tune playing or sit and watch others enjoy the moment. But I hope you live your life such that in the few seconds that death looms, when you look back you'd be able to smile and say you lived a full life. That you lived, and didn't just exist. That you played your role as main character in your life to the hilt, and you weren't just a flat character in other people’s lives. You took control and made good decisions. Cos really, what you do when you hold on to stuff is to give other people control over you even without their knowledge.

Whether or not we are able to accomplish all that we set out for the year to me is not the issue. At least we made plans. We hoped for something. If are able to work on them, good for us. If we achieve them, great! If we don’t we just remind ourselves that we aren’t growing any younger. Don’t be too hard on yourself. Please, take some time to smell the roses. Celebrate yourself for all you do right rebuke yourself for what you don’t. But forgive yourself and others and LIVE! Not just exist. Be a light in the corner where you are; you can’t light up the whole world. I think in summary, we all hope to be better persons than we were last  year, a better version of ourselves. Better mothers and fathers, better sisters and brothers, better friends, better Christians or Moslems, better children, better leaders, better students, better …, better …, just better than before.

Choose to let go. Choose peace. Choose to smile and be happy cos it's good for you. Have a wonderful year.